Driven by Running: When your passion becomes your identity

At what point does – what you do, become who you are? This is a question I’ve found myself asking a lot, and here’s why.

Not too long ago, I bumped into an old friend I hadn’t seen in years. He was with his teenage son, our conversation went like this:

Me: “Hey, man! Great to see you. We haven’t met since a long time! How have you been?”

Him: “All good, buddy. Hasn’t it been 4 or 5 years since we last met?”

(He turns to his son.)

Him: “This is Aashu uncle. He runs 100 km, runs for 12 hours straight, runs on roads, mountains, beaches—basically everywhere. And he also cycles and swims!”

Me (smiling, slightly embarrassed): “Your dad’s being a bit too kind! Nice to meet you, Champ. What’s your name? Do you like to run?”

This wasn’t the first time I’ve been introduced like this. Over the last few years, I’ve noticed a shift. I’m no longer just “Aashu” to people—I am “Aashu – who runs.” Running has become the defining trait people associate with me. I can’t pinpoint when this happened, but it’s real. And to be honest, I’m not complaining.

But it does make me think. Has running become so intertwined with my identity that it overshadows everything else? And what would happen if I stopped?

Here are a few questions that often come to mind:

• How did the people who knew me before my running obsession shape this identity about me?
• There is a lot more to me than just being a runner, but has the runner in me consumed my whole persona?
• If I suddenly stopped running, would people still associate me with this identity?
• Is this identity now shaping my non-running self too?

Maybe these thoughts sound a bit strange, but they’re real.

I think if you have been running for long enough, or passionately enough, you’ll understand this. If you’re a runner and feel the same, welcome to the club! And if you’re a runner who doesn’t yet feel this way, let me share a secret—it’ll happen to you soon enough.

What’s surprising is how this identity seeps into every part of life—family, work, social circles, even casual acquaintances. Running becomes the narrative that defines you in every space you occupy.

There’s a certain intriguing duality to this. On one hand, it’s flattering—being recognized for something you’re passionate about is always a great feeling. But on rare occasions, it can feel a bit stifling, like there’s no escaping it.

That leads me to another story.

A while back, I caught up with a group of old friends. We spent the evening drinking, eating, and reminiscing—just like we always do. As the night wore on, only one of my closest friends and I remained awake, still chatting.

Out of nowhere, he said, “Man, there’s just so much ‘running’ about you. I know you’ll never get bored of talking about it, but after a while, it becomes too much. Take this evening, for example. Don’t you think?”

At the time, I brushed it off. We had another drink, and the night went on. But his words stayed with me. They echoed in my mind long after that evening ended.

My family, friends, and even acquaintances have mentioned this to me several times: when I’m around, there’s always talk of running and fitness. Whether we’re at dinner, on a road trip, or just hanging out, the conversation somehow always circles back to running. I don’t notice it—but the people around me do. Thankfully, they tolerate it, indulging me when it gets to be too much.

Chris Anderson, the curator of TED Talks, describes a term “throughline”—a theme that connects every part of a story, which is essential for a great story. It seems my throughline is always about running!

But here’s the thing: I don’t think I’m alone in this. Whether it’s running, cycling, painting, or work, many of us have that one passion that shapes our identity. The question is, how much of our identity do we let it consume? And when do we take a step back and remind ourselves that there’s more to us than just that one thing?

So, to all the runners—and all the passionate people out there—how much of you is defined by what you do? And is that how you want it to be?

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If you have any thoughts or feedback, feel free to reach out to me at aashutosh[dot]chaudhari[at]gmail[dot]com—I promise to reply!